Free yourself and your children at home!
Stop doing everything for your children 🛑
At weekends and in the evenings, after busy days, we all hope to rest and recharge our batteries. And that goes for the whole family, including parents.
Yet how many of us end up acting as drivers, cooks, entertainers and even stewards without ever stopping?
One of the reasons for this overload is the Western family model that has taken hold over the last century: the nuclear family.
In the past, parents benefited from the daily help of extended family or neighbors. Today, everything rests on the shoulders of the parents.
So what do we do?
We delegate at work... Why not delegate at home too?
I suggest that you let your children help you with daily chores to lighten your mental and physical load. The idea is not to give them inappropriate responsibilities, but to enable them to contribute to family life, according to their age and abilities.
The Montessori principle: Autonomy from an early age
Maria Montessori summed up this approach perfectly when she said: "Never help a child to do a task that he or she feels capable of doing alone". I experienced this with one of my twins, who from the age of 4 regularly asked me: "Can I help you, Mommy? Since then, he's never left the kitchen without setting the table or helping to prepare the meal. 🍝
This willingness to help is natural for children. However, we sometimes tend to curb it by asking them to look after themselves, in front of the TV for example, while we get on with the daily tasks in our own way and more quickly.
But by enabling them to participate actively, we not only teach them autonomy, but also ease the burden of our daily lives.
A simple strategy: an adapted task list
I suggest you create a list of tasks with your children, adapted to their age and skills.
For example:
- Water the plants 🌿
- Putting away groceries 🛒
- Help prepare the meal 🍽
- Dusting 🧹
- Fold the socks 🧦
- Sorting toys 🧸
This list becomes a kind of contract between you and them.
But beware: as a parent, there's only one rule to follow: accept that not everything is perfect. The aim is to learn, not to strive for perfection.
How do you get the message across to your children?
Here are three key messages to encourage your children to play the game:
- We're a team: everyone contributes to the life of the house.
- Everyone has their own list of chores: a clear division of tasks helps to give each family member a sense of responsibility.
- Everyone is responsible: if, for example, your snack isn't in your schoolbag, it's up to you to think about it, not me.
Less mental workload, more autonomy
This family contract allows your child to gain autonomy while reducing your mental load. I introduced this principle with my three children several years ago, and I can assure you that it has really lightened our daily routine.
I remember my eldest son when he was in primary school: he forgot his snack only once, not twice! 😜
So the next time you feel overwhelmed by household chores, think about delegating... at home too. Your children are ready to help you, but you just have to give them the opportunity!
Delegating at home is an excellent way to teach our children independence and build their self-confidence, while easing our daily workload.
Let's not wait for them to grow up before instilling in them a sense of responsibility.
After all, in family as in work, success is all about collaboration ✨
The Soft Kids team 🌈
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